There Is a Tire at the End of This Post
April 03, 2015
So a small handful of people expressed concerns (or rather hopes, dreams) that this blog was the source of the Stress That Is Eating Amy's Skin Alive, and that I was perhaps vagueblogging about its imminent demise/shutdown.
To which I say: Sorry, Internet. You're still not getting rid of this ol' dinosaur just yet.
I mean, honestly, you guys are pretty great. You are funny and kind and also I SUPER APPRECIATE how understanding and engaged you've been with the recent uptick in sponsored posts. (Which wasn't exactly planned for, and I doubt will continue much longer; it's more a result of typical feast/famine on that sort of thing.) I will continue to post here as much as a can and to also do my best to make the sponsored stuff as amusing as possible, or at least seem like something I would write about regardless.
(Speaking of: Attention winemakers of the world. I have upcoming sponsored posting spots available on my editorial calendar. Please to send me some alcohol.)
(Ha ha ha "editorial calendar." Like this shitshow is that organized.)
If anything, I still want to follow-through on that whole "posting/writing more" thing, even without the ads/sponsorships/whatever. Those sure are nice but certainly not to be counted on, which is fine. But writing here IS relaxing and a touch therapeutic, even if I'm no longer the professional/compulsive oversharer I once was.
But now back to YOU GUYS, aka the REAL HEROES, and how amusing (and surprising!) it was to hear that so many of you have been reading since the original TIREWATCH back in 2006. (To be clear, this is a different tire. I know. And I don't know.) I mean, that's awesome. But also, that's a hell of a commitment to online procrastination and CAPS LOCK. Christ, what have we all been doing with our collective lives??
Yikes. Before this post takes too sharp of a turn into Existential Crisisville, here's today's TIREWATCH 2015 update, in which Ezra has some questions about the Tire:
TIREWATCH 2015 from amalah on Vimeo.
This has been TIREWATCH 2015: THE TIREWATCHENING, brought to you by your friendly neighborhood assholes who were like WHEEEEEE IT'S WARM IT'S SPRING LET'S EAT OUTSIDE when really it wasn't that warm and also pretty windy so our food just got super cold really fast and also I had to stare at a goddamn tire the whole time. :-(
I totally remember the original TireWatch. And then I realized it's been .. a long time. O.O
Posted by: Lis | April 03, 2015 at 09:42 AM
Oh man, I remember original TireWatch too. And it's been almost 5 years since "waffle. no waffle" and my oldest (now 14) STILL quotes entire sections of Ceiba-dialogue from those posts. I think you may be the only one still standing from my blogroll of that era - so please don't leave us, Amy!
Posted by: Emily | April 03, 2015 at 09:55 AM
I came for the Coach bags and stayed for the fun.
Posted by: Gail | April 03, 2015 at 09:55 AM
I'm just going to assume that Random Tires are a Jason Thing. Perhaps they're therapeutic!
Posted by: Suzy Q | April 03, 2015 at 09:57 AM
Oh yeah, 2006, was reading your blog, Finslippy, Sweet Juniper, and Dooce. Pretty much just you and Dooce left blogging these days. Now I feel like I'm holding up a lighter at a Journey concert or something. ROCK AND ROLL WILL NEVER DIE BITCHEZZ YEAH
Posted by: flybigd | April 03, 2015 at 09:58 AM
I don't think I've been around since the original tirewatch, but I found you from when TJ used to babysit for Noah and she linked over to this site. Love it.
Posted by: Amy | April 03, 2015 at 10:34 AM
I'm dating myself too, I remember TireWatch First Edition and I was in an office back then! Now I'm a stay at home mom. Some things change, refreshing that not all things do :-)
Posted by: Sirena | April 03, 2015 at 10:35 AM
Yep, been here the whole time! Don't ever change! Otherwise, how could I make myself feel better about the FREAKING BATHTUB that is still in my FREAKING BACK YARD
Posted by: Sarahd | April 03, 2015 at 10:57 AM
ever since we remodeled the bathroom. In 2012. Kill me!
Posted by: Sarahd | April 03, 2015 at 10:58 AM
Posted by: Lynn | April 03, 2015 at 11:04 AM
reading this post is when it hit me just how effing long ago 2006 was! and i started reading your blog in '02-'03! wow! noah is around the age my daughter was when i got hooked on this here blog...and she's almost done with her freshman year in college! after taking a year off! GAH!
omg, i'll stop now before i realize any further just how old all this makes me!!!
still can't wait to see what the next 12+ yrs hold for us all! :)
Posted by: junkie | April 03, 2015 at 11:09 AM
yep! Way back reader here. I was around before Noah so that counts for something, right? Keep on keepin' on, Amy. It'll all work out in the end.
Posted by: AmyH | April 03, 2015 at 12:53 PM
Another longtimer here. I've been reading (and laughing) since before Noah was around. You and Miss Doxie were my must reads at that time. Now Doxie is only on FB I think. I've branched out some on my internet exploration, but would be very sad if you went anywhere!
Posted by: Charlen | April 03, 2015 at 12:58 PM
I "only" started reading in 2011 while pregnant with my daughter but while night/day endless breast feeding I did go back and read your entire archive. Because it made me happy and I needed something that made me smile in my life at that time. Once I reached present day and Ike, I kept reading for cloth diaper advice and general sanity advice, and now I'm a work from home mom with my kid out of preschool so... yeah, I've been going through existential crisis time over here, too, but it's been super comforting to read you going through everything at the same time as me. So grateful for your online presence through these past 4 years!!
Posted by: Kate | April 03, 2015 at 01:24 PM
I've enjoyed reading your blog since I was pregnant with my second child in 2005. At the time I was writing my own blog and had a tiny group of other like-minded souls who checked in on each other almost every day. One of those souls pointed me in your direction and it was love at first sight! Probably the funniest thing I have ever read anywhere was your "review" of a corporate cookbook, recipes provided by employees of that company. Oh God, the laughter! My friend Maria and I still laugh about it, especially since we have a co-worker named Diana who is actually bat shit insane.
Posted by: Robyn | April 03, 2015 at 01:33 PM
Hah. I thought I'd been reading since the original tirewatch, then realized I found your blog while I was on maternity leave in 2009 and went back and read ALL THE ARCHIVES. So I'm just a poser. Also, that is not Ezra. Your children have all been replaced by enormous monster versions of themselves. Even Noah is not as large as this boy in the video; certainly not the Mighty Zah, and Baby Ike will forever be crawling. The End.
Posted by: Carrie | April 03, 2015 at 01:53 PM
I was not here for the original tire watch when it was posted (or maybe I was?), but I have read that post before, so I may have also gone back and read some from earlier. More importantly, you don't have to feel bad about doing sponsored posts. I do work for money, too, and people act like it's some virtuous thing to do, so seriously, I hope you don't beat yourself up over that. Turns out, it's a great way to support a family. Also, yay! You're not intending to immediately ditch the blog! I wouldn't blame you if you did, but I am glad to anticipate future posts.
Best to all... even the tire.
Posted by: not supergirl | April 03, 2015 at 02:17 PM
I've been here forfreakinevah. It took me years to comment!
So if you didn't like my tyre swang idea, you could always lay (lie) it on it's side, fill it with sand and call it a sandbox/neighborhood cat litter box.
Posted by: Sue W. | April 03, 2015 at 03:09 PM
I don't mind your sponsored posts. I always like hearing your perspective on things, it's helpful! And you gotta make a living. You are a raging success at making the sponsored posts funny and interesting.
Every single video I make of my almost-four-year-old ends with "Can I see the video???" Sigh. Some day I will learn how to edit that off.
Posted by: Liz | April 03, 2015 at 03:14 PM
Have been checking on you daily since early Noah- more often than I check in on my Mom or sisters. I remember the embarrassment of my boyfriend (now husband) asking when he would meet my friend Amy who loves Steel Magnolias and wine. I had to confess it was a very one sided friendship. :) LYLAS- don't change!!
Posted by: heather | April 03, 2015 at 04:17 PM
I've been reading since 2009 when I was pregnant with my first child and stumbled onto your awesome pregnancy calendar. The kid is 5 now - where did the time go? Seriously though, I always enjoy your posts, sponsored or not - no need to worry about that.
Posted by: Iva | April 03, 2015 at 04:27 PM
I've read you since you used some other format at a completely different server space. ya. that long. you take things in life and somehow manage to find the funnay!
Posted by: bean | April 03, 2015 at 04:31 PM
I've been reading/lurking/maybe commenting once every few years since before Noah was born. Reading your blog helped while I was lonely and alienated when I hopped continents in 2005. So what I'm saying here is
PLEASE NEVER GO AWAY. Even we non-commenting lurkers had a moment of almost-commenting panic :)
Posted by: Sarah c. | April 03, 2015 at 04:34 PM
I plan on reading here until we can overshare about our grandkids and comment about how our kids are spoiling them, I tell you. Or, alternatively, our kids are going to drive them away with their strict rules.
Posted by: Bee | April 03, 2015 at 06:05 PM
Ditto that, ditto that, and that, and all the that's. Seriously. I remember squeeeing with glee when you were blogging, doing Smackdown, the pregnancy calendar, Babble AND MamaPop. It was like all-you-can-read Amalah; all Amalah all the time! And I was in heaven. So yeah, don't never give up on this here blog, or I might have to come be your friend IRL ;~) (I too came for the Coach, and stayed for the scary timely funnies....)
Posted by: Laura | April 03, 2015 at 06:15 PM
Loved Max walking by! And I too started reading post-tire-craziness-2006 (I started reading when Ezra was born and now apparently he's a giant!) and found myself sucked into your archives. I've read every amalah post ever ... Probably twice if I'm being honest. Keep on keepin on!
Posted by: Maggie | April 03, 2015 at 08:29 PM
Yours was part of my Initial Blog Discovery back in...wait for it...2004!
Posted by: Frema | April 03, 2015 at 08:46 PM
I honestly find myself enjoying the sponsored posts. Everywhere else I find myself skipping the posts and leaving a blog if there are too many, but you always make them quite funny. Often I am surprised to reach the end of a post and see that it is sponsored.
Posted by: Rachel M | April 04, 2015 at 01:12 PM
Joining the hordes who say they were here since way back when (in my case, 2004! 11 years?! WHAT.). Back then I was a bored 20-something working a desk job; now I'm in my late 30s, and a work from home Mom with two kids.
Anyway - please don't go away. :)
Posted by: Lucy | April 04, 2015 at 09:38 PM
I feel I should warn you... where there is one tyre, usually there are more. ..
Posted by: wendy | April 05, 2015 at 05:47 PM
I remember reading the original tirewatch as well!
Posted by: Heather | April 06, 2015 at 10:36 AM
I'm trying to remember how I found your blog. I'm pretty sure you were mentioned on another blog, so I clicked over and have been here ever since. Metrodad, maybe? Was also at that time reading Bossy and a mom from Alabama that I can't recall the name. Hope this continues to stay fun for you!
Posted by: Joy | April 06, 2015 at 11:15 AM
I remember tire watch! I've been following since My daughter (2nd grade) was a cluster feeding nightmare, so I was pinned down for HOURS every day. I went through all the archives back then too :)
Posted by: KimC | April 06, 2015 at 11:39 AM
Soooo glad that I had the schedule from hell the last week and didn't read the last post until now. I was scared the funny/sweet was going to be cut off, but then yay, it's not (riiiiight?). Also: is it crazier that I've only been reading since 2009 but read all your archives and thus was totally "heh, tire" when I saw that title?
And thanks for the clarification, because I was wondering where the tire had been hiding all these years. If it were the same tire, it would only be appropriate if it had shown up hanging out with Thomas the train at some point!
Posted by: Kathleen | April 06, 2015 at 11:52 AM
I'M HANGING WITH YOU AND MIR UNTIL THEY PRY MY COLD FINGERS OFF MY ALLCAPS BUTTON.
That is all.
Posted by: KImtoo | April 06, 2015 at 01:15 PM
Does it help if it seems like I just started reading yesterday? I've seen my children grow up and all, but ... I swear I just discovered you yesterday, and I am still so excited to read you each time you post. But when I look back, ahem, yes, I've been reading a long, long time ..
Posted by: Elizabeth_K | April 06, 2015 at 02:55 PM
Oh, thank heaven. I have been reading since Noah was a toddler and have in a state of anxiety that you were closing up shop. I would miss the funny a lot. You make my days brighter.
Posted by: Stacy | April 07, 2015 at 09:15 PM
Sheesh....been in a state of anxiety.
Posted by: Stacy | April 07, 2015 at 09:16 PM