37 is the New Poor Life Choices
June 25, 2015
The late-30s life crisis continues.
I am officially ridiculous. Sorry, Mom. :(
A friend asked for company/moral support during her piercing appointment, and that quickly spiraled into me finally getting the navel piercing I've wanted ever since I was 16. Which was over 20 years ago. Okay, self. Now let's get off the teenage wish fulfillment train before it takes us a NKOTB reunion concert.
I should note that this is the EXACT scenario that led to me getting a terribly regrettable tattoo when I was 19 years old. I went with a friend for support and was like, MEEEE TOOOO but I only had $50 and awful ideas so I got JASON tattooed on my back hip. It now looks more like JBLSHN because the work was so shitty and I picked a stupid font to begin with. I want to get some cover-up work done on it but haven't yet because every time I go to a tattoo parlor I'm like YAY STAB ME SOMEWHERE INSTEAD.
And then every time I get something pierced I remember HOW MUCH I HATE GETTING THINGS PIERCED. I don't mind the actual procedure (and this one was especially easy because after a tummy tuck your stomach is mostly numb for a full year, so I didn't feel a thing.) But I hate the aftercare and the long healing process and worrying about whether it looks infected and OW OW OW accidentally grazing it with a towel while drying off after a shower. (Seriously: Towels are the bitter, snaggy enemy of new body jewelry.)
Anyway, what's done is done. My blindingly white, artificially flat stomach is now pierced and I'm like, totally going to be the coolest girl on the church youth group bus trip to the Jersey Shore this summer, like FINALLY.
I ripped out my nose ring one time with a towel. I thought I had ripped out my entire left nostril. Love the belly, babe!
Posted by: Bridges | June 25, 2015 at 11:20 AM
I always enjoy a good midlife crisis, aka the shit we should have just fucking done already.
Posted by: Lynn | June 25, 2015 at 11:23 AM
I think Jblshn should get his pierced too.
Posted by: Avitable | June 25, 2015 at 11:24 AM
It looks awesome on your flat tummy!
Posted by: Jillian k d | June 25, 2015 at 11:26 AM
Ha! I just took my belly ring out after nearly 20 years. I don't have the stomach you have though, so it's better this way. Snagging it will always be a problem - be aware :)
Posted by: Melissa | June 25, 2015 at 11:29 AM
(h.e double hockey sticks) yeah!! Go Amy!! I have a to-do list for this year (for my big 4-0) and a new tattoo is on there so I say to you- There is no age limit on awesome! (also, I wish I had your flat tummy)
Posted by: Tamara Tedd | June 25, 2015 at 11:31 AM
Post baby and tummy tuck is the way to go. I got mine when I was 15. 16 years and two pregnancies later it resembles a second belly button lol! I'd get it re-pierced but just no. I'll live vicariously through you thanks. :)
Posted by: Tricia | June 25, 2015 at 11:36 AM
I got my first tattoo last year on my 36th birthday. And have been to a couple of those NKOTB concerts. So I am also officially in the midst of some sort of midlife crisis. Mine is pretty sad though as I am still too scared to tell my mom and dad about the tattoo. I am - apparently - still afraid that they will limit my phone time. Or tell me I can't go to another NKOTB concert.
Posted by: April | June 25, 2015 at 11:39 AM
You deserve it after all the hard work you have been doing on your bod. Bikini time!
Posted by: Beverly | June 25, 2015 at 11:41 AM
Only my ears are pierced. BUT! I have TWO tattoo's! The one on my back started out as a single cherry blossom in memory of my late Japanese mother-in-law. Then I got a hummingbird on the inside of my right arm. Then I decided to do a "memorial cherry TREE" on my back with other loved-ones who have passed. I now have 6 total cherry blossoms and one bud which symbolizes the baby we lost a gozillion years ago. So I say, rock on with your pierced self. It's your body!
Posted by: Sue W. | June 25, 2015 at 11:42 AM
The thing I wanted most for my 40th birthday was a tattoo. I still haven't done it yet.
Posted by: jodi | June 25, 2015 at 11:47 AM
I have found that tattoos are like Pringles - once you pop you can't stop. I currently have 9, because the few I had were good until my friend became a tattoo artist and I could get them on the cheap. Now it's like, "Stab me with pointy things I neeeeed iiit".
Posted by: Sam | June 25, 2015 at 11:49 AM
I know someone whose three 30-something daughters blew him off on Father's Day to go to NKOTB concert.
Fortunately, it POURED with rain during the concert. Karma.
Posted by: Sasha | June 25, 2015 at 12:35 PM
I have two tattoos: a butterfly just below the front of my right collarbone, and a ladybug on my bag. I DON'T FUCKING LIKE LADYBUGS ENOUGH TO HAVE ONE PERMANENTLY STAMPED ONTO MY BODY, BUT TEQUILA. I got them the same day. I have no additional piercings but I do want to pretty up my fading little butterfly with some clouds and maybe a butterfly friend and the sun and some trees and oh.
Posted by: Arnebya | June 25, 2015 at 01:27 PM
Be glad you chose to do it post-baby-making. I had mine done during my quarter life crisis. Then pregnancy in my early 30s stretched out the hole and made it all sorts of ugly. I now have an un-artificially round stomach, so it just wouldn't be cute anymore.
Posted by: Wendy | June 25, 2015 at 01:32 PM
I recently got my nipples pierced fulfilling a 15 year piercing longing....nothin feels better than ill advised piercings on a 30 something year old church mom body! I feel super sexy all the time now! Worth it!
Posted by: Meg T. | June 25, 2015 at 01:54 PM
You go girl! No really, more power to you. :) That stomach though. WANT! 2xC-section gross tummy over here. Blech.
Posted by: Lauren | June 25, 2015 at 02:09 PM
You tattooed Jason when you were 19!!! And it still works --- that's the most amazing thing about this post --- you are so lucky/happy in love -- great story.
Posted by: Elizabeth_K | June 25, 2015 at 03:27 PM
Good for you! If I had that stomach I'd be rockin' that piercing, too.
I'm in the midst of my own midlife shenanigans and just got hair extensions today, after a lifetime of dealing with baby fine, do-nothing hair. To say I love them would be an understatement--so this is what it's like to have full hair!!
And I think it's awesome that you had 'Jason' inked at 19 and you two are together now and forever--can't wait to see what you're up to next!
Posted by: Amy A | June 25, 2015 at 06:13 PM
Your stomach looks great. The piercing, not so much.
Posted by: Phyllis | June 25, 2015 at 06:43 PM
(long time lurker, first time commenter...) Gahh. I'm jealous. I'm only 27 and I got mine pierced in Dec bc I'd always liked how it looked. I passed out on the table and then 5 months later my body was like, eh, I don't wanna, and tried to spit it out. So now I just have a scar. >.<
Posted by: Melissa D | June 25, 2015 at 07:46 PM
I got mine pierced for my husband for our 15th wedding anniversary. Still have it today and married 25 years. FYI when they say it takes 6-8 months to heal they mean it!! Contemplating a tattoo next.....
Posted by: Karen | June 26, 2015 at 12:55 AM
I would just like to throw out there that I did the NKOTB reunion concert and that should definitely be on your bucket list. Best concert ever! Stadium packed with 30-something moms and gay men and all where screaming. So awesome!
Posted by: Melissa | June 26, 2015 at 10:33 AM
I didn't get my first tattoo until the ripe old age of 38. Now, I'm 42, have 5 tattoos, and a couple more in mind. :)
Posted by: Ivie | June 26, 2015 at 11:40 AM
WOW. I've been on the fence on fixing my umbilical hernia/post-C section tummy, and yours ROCKS. If only I could skip the surgery part of it all. :)
Posted by: Barbara | June 26, 2015 at 03:51 PM
I got mine done at 16 and I still have it and love it and I am going to 31 in a few months.
Posted by: HeatherB484 | June 28, 2015 at 06:58 PM