Funny Faces
Let's Distract Ourselves With All the Dumb Stuff I Did This Week

Summer House Rules

1) No fighting.

2) No fake fighting, where one of you screeeeeeeeeeeams bloody murder because someone else is doing something you actually secretly love/want them to do/were literally just doing to them 15 seconds earlier.

3) Are you bleeding? 

    3a) No? You're fine.

    3b) Yes? You know where the band-aids are. You're fine.

4) No letting neighborhood kids in our house to play before 7 a.m., oh my God.

5) It's 11 a.m. STOP EATING BREAKFAST.

6) It's 12:01 p.m. FINE FINE I WILL MAKE LUNCH STOP ASKING

7) No interrupting Mom while she's working.

8) Especially to talk about Minecraft.

9) Or to ask if I'm done with work yet, are you done yet, how about now, are you done yet.

10) Anyone who whines about being bored gets to unload the dishwasher, yay!

11) Anyone who claims they're "starving" gets a nice big bowl of vegetables, yum!

12) Unless you are Ezra, who actually will make me get up and make him a nice big bowl of vegetables.

13) Ezra gets my sincerest best wishes on not dying of starvation in the next 45 minutes or whatever. 

14) Look, you can stay in pajamas all day if you want but not like, the SAME pajamas every day. 

15) No whining about the kiddie pool not having any water in it; the entire backyard is a perma-swamp already, just go doggy-paddle in the grass.

16) Please don't make a huge mess please don't make a huge mess please

17) Please clean up this huge mess. 

18) EVERYBODY GO PLAY OUTSIDE.

19) Baths are futile and pointless. I'm glad we're finally on the same page about something.

20) Daily dance parties, on the other hand, are mandatory. 

I THANK EVERYBODY IN ADVANCE FOR YOUR COOPERATION. 

Comments

sara

#15 automatically makes a Huge Fail of #16.
Good wishes!!!

Sue W.

Please let us know tomorrow how this is working for you! Somehow I think all of the rules listed and some that are not will be broken!

Elizabeth

"Is there blood? No? Then don't yell for me." I had to amend this rule after the day I looked out the window and found my child stuck upside down waiting to fall about 6 feet off a swingset, because she thought she wasn't supposed to yell for help until after there was blood....

Lynn

#15, for realz OMFG. I'm meeeeelting.

Rachel

I may post this as rules for my kids (ages 15 & 18), lol. (Except: the one about baths (showers), they are frequently required & make your own lunch, you're a teen now.) Great list.

Amanda

Wish we lived next door - my 13 year old is literally dying to be somebody's "Mommy Helper" so she can practice her mad babysitting skillz (with life saving certificate in hand).

Lee

#15: Do I get to join in even though I stupidly decided to re-sod the backyard two days before a)all 6 of my children started summer break b) ten days straight of heavy rainfall warnings? The half I finished in time looks lush, green and beautiful, the other half looks like you dug a trench in pig pen. And then six people ran through the trench/pen and directly into my house.

Lauren

Good Luck.....

Karin

Have you tried GoNoole with the boys for your dance parties? Go to GoNoodle.com and set up a free account and the watch ALL the KooKooKangaRoo videos! Instant dance-party! I'm guessing you could even liven up your day with some "secret handshakes!" There are tons of videos on GN that are great fun. (I don't work for GN, but I probably should!)

Meri

I convinced a preschooler once that the cut on his hand was Koolaid (I thought it was) and it worked for about 5 minutes until it started bleeding again.

Oh, and my mom used to make us run laps around the house when we got too rambunctious.

That's all I've got.

Jill

No no no, baths are not futile and pointless. They are an easy way to kill 45 min in the middle of the day because here! It's too hot for the pool! Play as long as you like and now extra movie time before bed b/c you are already bathed.

Ladotyk

Haha how on earth do you get any work done at home?

A

As someone who also works from home... ohmygoshYES! The struggle is real.

Haley

I volunteered at VBS this week, and a favorite game was a thawing a frozen old t-shirt with just the sun and a bucket of water. I guarantee it will keep them busy for at least twenty minutes. Give them three shirts and they can race!

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