One week ago, I looked in the mirror and said, "Yep, that's viral pinkeye, right there."
And then went on my merry hand-washing way, because viral! What are you gonna do?
"Well you can't just do NOTHING," Jason said a couple days later, staring at my eyes in horror. "You look AWFUL."
I argued with him for a little bit, then Googled some more, eventually coming across a description of Epidemic keratoconjunctivitis.
I texted him a link. "BAM. This is what I have."
"STOP DIAGNOSING YOURSELF," was the reply. "GO TO THE DOCTOR."
And thus, the journey began. Antibiotics, worsening symptoms, symptoms that could be something other than "just" pinkeye, a referral to an eye center that said oh, sorry, we sent ALL OF OUR DOCTORS TO A CONFERENCE TODAY ALL AT ONCE, WE CAN'T SEE YOU UNTIL MONDAY, a massive allergic reaction (IN MY EYES) to the antibiotics, more antibiotics, steroids, corneal abrasion and possible orbital cellulitis.
I am happy to report that the journey more or less ended today, when the eye center's cornea expert looked in my eyes and said, "Yep, that's viral pinkeye, right there."
More specifically, it's Epidemic keratoconjunctivitis, or EKC for short, which means I am basically practically a honorary doctor now.
So while I'm very happy I won't be spending the rest of the week in the hospital, this still isn't the greatest of news, because there's literally nothing they can do for EKC, and it can last for several more weeks. I'm to stop all medications (including the super-rare antibiotic/steroid combo drops Jason went to four different pharmacies in search of last night) and focus all my energy on the fact that I am contagious as fuck and will be for quite some time. I go back for another check next week.
We were supposed to cut down our Christmas tree this past weekend. Definitely did not happen. Jason took the boys to see Santa while I languished in the ER for the second time in a week because I now had allergic conjunctivitis on top of the keratoconjunctivitis, like some kind of disgusting parfait of pinkeye. I haven't done a single clever pose with The Damn Elf and poor Ezra filled their advent boxes with candy himself because I got exhausted after the first few. The house is a DISASTER and I haven't done any shopping.
This was not how I pictured our first holiday season here.
After my appointment today, Ike asked if I was feeling better yet. I told him a little, yes.
"Can we go get our Christmas tree now?" he pleaded. "Today? Tonight?"
Probably not quite yet, dude. But soon. I'll be better soon.
(Prob just gonna send Jason to buy a tree from a parking lot. Christmas 2015 is shaping up to be a bit of a wash.)