Wow, what a completely boring, uneventful weekend we just had. Amazing how much life calms down once all your pets stop dying.
Jason's company threw a party at an Orioles game; I did not attend, even though I am once again technically working part time for his company (yay me! yay money!). He sent me photos of the open bar while I stayed home and sent photos of the calzones I made for dinner.
These were mushroom and collard greens calzones, which my children actually honestly ate with so much enthusiasm you'd think we were in a Totino's Pizza Roll commercial. Calzones just might be the new stupid tiny buns.
Later, I sat uselessly by for the accidental malicious destruction of one of the 45 million stupid asshole Minion toys the boys seem to have accumulated...
...only for Jason to arrive home with some instant karma he'd bought the kids at the ballpark.
Just look at those fucking things. I've never been so consumed with the simultaneous urge to shove something in my mouth while also wanting to see what would happen if I just hurled it at the wall instead.
(We realized none of the boys had ever tasted a Twinkie before these montrosities. Of course they went batshit over them and my calzone victory was quickly and swiftly forgotten.)
On Saturday we took the boys to a Spring festival downtown for even more questionable food choices. We also brought Beau. Here he is patiently waiting for Ike to drop his third slice of pizza on the ground.
Things we learned on this outing:
1) Beau is beautifully behaved in crowds and around children and other dogs, even other dogs who repeatedly try to hump his head.
2) There is something about Beau that makes random strangers literally squee at the sight of him. (I think it's his ears, or his face, or the fact that he's basically just Peak Cute Mutt Dog overall). And everybody wants to pet him and hear his adoption story, so like, give yourself an extra 15 minutes to get from Point A to Point B.
(I actually already had experience with item 2 after I took him to PetSmart one time. I went in for two things and was there for almost a full hour fielding petting/rescue backstory requests from shoppers and employees alike, including one pet food representative who ended up hugging me in the middle of the kibble aisle after hearing about Ceiba and Max. Then she pulled out a photo of her dead Min Pin and started crying really hard and anyway, long story short, I mostly just buy dog food on Amazon now.)
Here is Beau, Jason's Star Wars Vans, and some seriously fabulous background pants.
And here is Ike, his trusty sock zombie, and a chair that is not ours.
Not pictured: the toilet paper roll bird feeder he made and was INCREDIBLY proud of, but then dropped at some point and left it behind. Much upset, many tears. So a remake is going to be our afternoon activity today.
Luckily I also order big-ass bags of bird seed on Amazon too, because we inherited a bird feeder and I'm weirdly compelled to keep filling it. But it empties out constantly and now I have a million asshole birds to feed and they are all very pretty but not very smart and tend to fly into our front windows a lot. Anyway, long story short, I think adding a second bird feeder made out of a toilet paper roll in our front yard is really going to class up the joint.