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Beach House Rules, 2018 Edition

We're back from a lovely week away at the beach, where perfect days were sandwiched between hellish sleepness nights because the residents of the apartment above us apparently liked to run laps in combat boots while rearranging all the furniture between 3 and 5 a.m. 

We did not particularly love our rental this year, because 1) SEE ABOVE, and  2) We discovered during dinner one night that it was possible to very easily and accidentally trip the lock on the sliding door leading out to the second-story, screened-in deck from the inside, thus locking your damn ass outside. 

We were all completely stuck for about 20 minutes until we managed to get the attention of some people coming down a nearby flight stairs (who, thankfully, were NOT the nocturnal Sumo wrestlers from directly upstairs) who came inside our unit and rescued us. Meanwhile, we'd left the stove on and all the smoke alarms started going off, and I don't think I need to even TELL YOU who specifically and "accidentally" tripped the inside lock, right?


Mmm-hmmm. Baby Ike is back on his bullshit. 

Also, 3) This was on the coffee table and haunted my every waking moment, because WTeverlovingF.

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But, you know, whatever. We never spend all that much time in the rental anyway, especially when we luck out with a week of near-perfect beach weather.



(Can I just say that going to the beach with older children is like, WHERE IT IS AT? No diapers or sand-poops! No maniacal toddlers running out to sea! Just semi-independent humans who can swim AND who are capable of carrying their own goddamn towel/boogie board/precious bucket o' shells back home at the end of the day! It's GLORIOUS.)

Plus they are much neater ice-cream eaters too. 



Meanwhile, the responsible adults stayed busy, doing questionable shit like...making habanero tequila:

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And playing beer pong.


(Let's consider this college prep.)


Anyway! It was a great trip, and now it's over. We brought home a bit more sand than I'd like but very little dirty laundry! We're finally getting good at this. 




Sounds like a fun vacation. Except for the stomping and the smoke alarms. The ceiling in the guest bedroom of our beach rental cracked right in half while we were there, much to the chagrin of my in-laws who were occupying it at the time. But nothing actually fell, so, winning!!


Thank you for the hope you just gave me. We just went to Bethany for four days with our two year-old and eight month-old and I am exhausted. And may have bitterly stared at people on the beach who got to sit in chairs and relax.


SO glad it was a wonderful (but real) time at the beach. You will look back at this time over the decades to come and feel the goodness. Your boys are all growing up gloriously and school must be restarting now which will be more change and hopefully good news for all of you.
Wishing you a fall of laughter, joy, love!

Sue W.

Sounds like a perfect vacay.


All in all, sounds like a blast. Well-deserved, and it gives me hope for the future, when my kids are a little older!

Lauren A

God... life to be lived and enjoyed...

anyone have the latest National Geographic? It’s too graphic of a walk through of the aftermath of a suicide attempt- but the statistic that stood out was that 90% of people who attempt suicide never do it again. My cousin Craig.,, would that he ‘d have known that momentary destructiveness wouldn’t last. I love that you are a testament at what is on the other side of those moments. That the French accept like “wee , we all want to throw ourselves off the Eiffel Tower, is tres acceptable ‘en all! But life, me wee...”

I am proud of you. We are not all our own decisions, voluntRy or not, forever. You are loved and you love... there is literally nothing else f*cking to it.


love this post!


So glad SIMON didn't make it on the trip with you. If its still alive... cut the blue wire.

Heather Laura Clarke

So happy to see a new post today! Not that I'd been obsessively visiting the blog at least three different times a day. Nope, not me! xo


Can I just inappropriately say that your husband is looking HAWT in that photo? Hmm, no, don't mind me. Glad you had a lovely time.


Maybe it wasn't sumo wrestlers upstairs that woke you up, that horrific sailor ceramic 'thing' came awake at night and stomped upside down on the just couldn't see him!

But yes, for us, two weeks in Gran Canaria with semi-capable/independent children = best holiday EVERRRRRR!

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