For what it’s worth, You’ve been entertaining me for free for years. I recently started funding a few web comic artists through Patreon because, again, free content that I very much enjoy. I’ve set up recurring monthly contributions for them, and wouldn’t hesitate to do so for you if you made it available.

UGHHHHHH I cannot believe people gave you crap. Please don't listen to the haters. So many of us love you and your family. Hugs. <3

LOL! I can only imagine what your brain has been doing since Ike's diagnosis. It's the classic "I will do EVERYTHING IN MY POWER FOR MY CHILD" versus "Shit... really? I LIKE my Starbucks every day!". I only have this to say. It's YOUR child and YOUR call and I don't think asking people if THEY want to make the decision to spend THEIR money to help out is in any way grifting. I was going to do the same thing so my daughter could go on this super awesome NY trip to see 2 Broadway shows, have classes with ACTUAL Broadway actors and sightsee (she's a theater kid and it would mean SO much to her) that we simply can't afford. But peeps thought that was TACKY. It IS okay to ask for help.

Oh for f*cks sake! I hate that you had to write this, and yet I'm glad you got it out of your head. I hate the haters, who find it so easy to judge from the anonymity of their keyboards!!!!!!

Monetize the sh*t out of your blog - those of us who feel your worth and words and heart will (always) be here.

xoxoxoxoxo

I, too, have been reading forever! Do the donate button. Then you give us a gift by being able to help you! Giving is the best feel-good thing to do!
:)

I am not in a position to help right now BUT ALSO have the capability to just let you post your donate button without having to wonder how you can possibly do things and have stuff and still ask for money, so.......f**k them. We have all had life take a sharp right turn on us, and maybe some things still exist from before said turn. Hell, maybe your mental health today NEEDED that coffee/pastry/psychiatric help from Lucy in her box-office on the corner and required nothing of you but $5 (or 5 cents if we're talking about Lucy's help). Whatevs. You do you. I'll be me. We'll be friends. End.

Dude. Fuck them. I have been reading your blog since before any of your children were born. You have give me literally hours of reading, laughing and some crying, too. Need some money? Hell, I'll give you some money. I don't have a lot extra, but I can help some. Shit happens. You can't plan for everything life is going to throw at you. Some things you can go without, but getting help for your baabbieess is not one of them. Let me know if you put up a button.

I was a consultant for Lindamood-Bell, and yes, it is pricey. I believe that they used to have financing, so there’s that. But it’s still yet another payment you have to make each month. I have faith in Ike, he’s a bright little guy, he’ll conquer this thing!

I get it. My district doesn't even recognize dyslexia as a thing, so we have been POP for an Orton Gilligham tutor for 4 years. Solidarity. (Also-- maybe you can find one in your area? Ours is a retired teacher, and our kiddo reads above grade level now.)

Another blogger points out that they were considering the Lindamood Bell program, but balked after seeing a job posting for a teacher.

Said blogger realized that she already had the qualifications to be an LB tutor, and took the online training program so she could evaluate and teach her own son. Saving herself, oh, about 9 thousand dollars.

I wish we had the extra to help. It's ridiculous that insurance doesn't cover these things. I'm battling now for my two year old and it's looking like private speech it is at about $150/week. It's ridiculous.

My two cents, feel free to ignore, but also maybe look at auditory processing disorder? My two year old is too young to diagnose and we can almost get my older one diagnosed, but it's another avenue to explore and you might get some free help too.

Also yes to option of a donate button. Other blogs I read have way more affiliate links. Don’t get why people are surprised by life having unexpected financial changes or circumstances. Also eating out less/ saving money on vacation/ saving on a particular brand can all be good things but won’t always solve the problem and even these things did, greatly reduce that joy of living that’s so important.

Sometimes you should just stop talking, Amy. I'm embarrassed for you.

WE WANT THE BUTTON.
Anvil needs to fuck right off and find a new blog to read.

I have donated for people's dogs. This is you son. People are gonna judge no matter what. If people want to help then let them :)

Bring on the button! I for one will support tattoos, Vegas trips and baby Ike

You’re not asking for charity. You are putting an OPTIONAL button on your page that allows - those that want to - to show their appreciation for all the years of entertainment you have provided by writing this blog. Haters gonna hate, for whatever reason they can find. If it isn’t this, it’ll be something else. Put the button up and let those of us who would like to thank you for your YEARS of free content, have the opportunity to do so.

I can't believe what people will say on the internet. I do want to tell you that my nephew has severe dyslexia. They live in a really good school district, and even there he wasn't making progress. His mom pulled him out for sixth grade, they did some home schooling and some specialized therapy for him, and he is now a college freshman majoring in engineering and doing great. Ike will do great too. And put your button back up. I'll donate just to shut the haters up (if only it were possible).

Well, obviously people who say "why don't you just ask for help" don't actually mean, like, actually ASKING FOR HELP - because that would be so greedy of you.
Come on. People are nuts. Forget about them. If you need help, you ask for help. People can choose whether to give it or not. I think it's a really brave thing to do, honestly. Screw the mindset of just stoically letting yourself drown silently.

Felt like I should comment on this one. The blogger/blog reader relationship is so weird - I've been reading you for years and years, I've followed your life, your ups and downs, the kids, allll of it. I've used your stories as a way to tentatively walk into this world as an adult, looking at your examples of how having kids and a family could look like. You're part of the voices which have destigmatized my own anxiety disorder to myself. You've provided me with enormous value (and entertainment), I care a lot about you and your family and your well being and yet, the relationship is totally one sided. I am often kind of uncomfortable with being such a lurker to people's lives, while also being invisible to them. One thing that helps me reconcile this is that I back a bunch of bloggers on patreon as it's the one tangible thing I can do that says "I appreciate you and what you do here". I love being in a position where I can give back, and add some tiny practical benefit to the lives of people I peer into from the online. I'm delighted you don't need to ask for help, but also please know that there are plenty of folks who would feel really good about donating, absolutely regardless of whether you 'need' it or not.

YES for button. Ignore the very few haters. You are loved by many.

Put it back up! I want to donate!

I have followed for years, long before I had kids. Then when I had kids, I struggled with not being heard when I knew that my oldest didn't experience the world in the same way as other kids. You were a blog I came back to often because you had been there, been through it, and tackled it with humor and compassion. My son is 7 now, and he gets both private services and services through his school and insurance doesn't consider his sensory processing differences a real thing so they have never covered his private OT even though he experiences gross and fine motor delays that interfere with his ADLs. I would love to be able to click on a donate button and support you in the same way you unknowingly supported me in some of my darker moments.

And now I'M going to be arguing with the shower wall at icky internet commenters. Aw Amy, there are people who deeply care, and say they want to help, because they do. There are probably people who say they want to help because it seems like a good thing to say (thoughts and prayers! 😠) There's a weird section of the population who is *offended* at the thought of someone suffering or someone in need, probably because it terrifies them to think it might ever happen to them. There but by the grace of God go all of us... it takes courage to ask and I wish you 100% peace with whatever you choose.

I’ve had similar arguments in my head when a goodbye freind decided to be judgey about my finances. It’s a terrible feeling. I’m sorry you had to deal with that. I’m glad you’ve picked up more work, but I’ll still be happy to PayPal some money your way. I’d do it for anyone in your family, critters included! So if need be put the button up. And those jerks who decided to be shitty can go sit in syrup, let the bees get ‘em.

I don’t begrudge people coffee, pets and vacations. Put a button, if you want. You are a really good writer and I got some great eyeliner info and kid info from you that’s really helped me over the year and continues to help me.

We have been reading you for years, so the least we can do is lend a helping hand when needed! You do that donate button when needed and don't let those judgey people get you! We love you and the kids and the pets and the tattoos <3

I can offer some info on Lindamood Bell because my D worked at two LB facilities, full-time for a year at a suburban location while saving up for grad school, then part-time for a half year at an urban location while attending grad school. I'll put everything in the past tense since I can't be sure it all still applies, though I suspect it does.

The training for instructors took two weeks. LB's methodology was very prescribed and rigid, and in the main the instructors didn't have a background in teaching children with reading problems, so they were required to simply deliver the packaged product. The kids attended every day after school for whatever number of weeks had been contracted for based on LB's initial evaluation and recommendation. My D felt the hardest part was working with kids who had already been in a classroom all day and often were inattentive either from fatigue or because they didn't want to spend one more minute at a desk. The level of dedication/diligence among the instructors was quite mixed. My D saw what you might call negligent work among some instructors and equally negligent supervision that let them get away with it. But other instructors were great. The urban location was the more difficult place to work because many of the inner city students (whose tuition was paid by the board of ed) did not have parents who would make sure they arrived on time, or arrived at all, and the kids were generally less interested in the whole process without parents who were heavily invested. For whatever reason, the instructors didn't care that much either, and the whole place just wasn't as well-run as the facility in the wealthy suburban area.

All in all my D enjoyed the work at LB and felt she was really helping many of the kids. She would have stayed longer if she had been able to mesh her schedule with LB's needs.

I guess my best advice to anyone considering LB would be to have your child spend a few hours there with the intended instructor to see if there's good chemistry and if the very specific style of instruction clicks with the kid before contacting for their very expensive course of treatment.

Best of luck.

Just another voice to say - you are writing FOR FREE and we are reading and laughing and being moved and being entertained FOR FREE. And for many years! If people don’t like it, they can just not donate and hell, if they’re going to be mean about it, stop reading. Put that donate button back up, girl, and leave it up.

I’ve been reading your blog for years and I’d love to have a way to contribute to the cause. You don’t owe anyone an explanation on how you spend your money.

Don’t let the bastartds bring you down. #momsquad.

Please sign up for a Patreon, or paypal or anything - I would be happy to help support help for Ike or any damn thing you please. When I had my first baby your blog and advice was there for me, and is still there for me now as she turns 5 next year and her little brother turns 2. Your struggles with anxiety and depression helped me feel like I was not alone. Your openness about your recent hospitalization helped me come forward for additional help. If I can send you money, to pay you for the services you have given me I would be happy to do so.

Please do not waste any more of your precious time, energy or mental health on people who would shame you for giving your readers an opportunity to pay you for the hard work that you put into maintaining this blog. Maybe I'm just feeling more sensitive than usual in the current bullshit social climate but I feel like this is a hugely gendered issue too. Women have always been told not to ask to be paid what we're worth. Fuck that.

Kottke posted something two years ago that I found really interesting and well thought-out: https://kottke.org/16/11/kottkeorg-memberships - although his blog isn't as personally-based as yours, much of his rationale would still apply. Take a look at all your monetization options and figure out what would work best for you and your loyal readers. Never hesitate to ask for what you're worth. Your work, your hard-earned money, do whatever the hell you want with it. Personally, I'm voting for more cool tattoos :)

You are terrific, do whatever you can to make things work better for your kid, because the world is on fire and all we can do is try to help the people we love (and those we don't!), and good luck with it all, especially on ignoring the people who are trying to make you feel bad.

I'm embarrassed for the person who's embarrassed. They clearly don't even know what a complete douchecanoe (thanks, Bloggess!) they sound like. Been reading since you discovered Noah had a Q-tip like head (my son did too! we had an MRI it was so big) and I felt a connection to you. I've stuck around because I love your ironic, self deprecating, spot on writing. You're awesome, and in a truly moral society we help out others when they need it. Without judgement. Clicking the button now.

Coming back to leave this link too: https://medium.com/s/powertrip/confessions-of-an-author-who-isnt-ashamed-to-do-sponcon-717b6bce6132 (via another smart woman making money by being awesome http://readingmytealeaves.com/)

I donated today instead of buying a latte. Fair is fair. Keep that button!

I love everyone who used the word "fuck" in their comments. I like to save it for when it matters. This matters. This community you have built matters, supports you, and can do what they want with their money - just as you can do what you want with yours. Happy to see the button. Happy to help.

Also - because Canadian - fucking eh!

I don’t see the button from my iPhone; where is it?

You owe us zero - zero + zero x zero explanations.

I’m one who pleaded with you to just ask me for help, with the caveat of *no questions asked no follow up needed no extra pressure on you for asking.*

People can snark, sure, but they can also more easily just stop reading and walk away but they don’t so that tells you straightaway that it’s something within *them* that they’d prefer snarking versus looking away from what they don’t like and doesn’t affect them.

Where be are is the button at, ladycakes? Email it to me?

(You do you, boo. I love Ike and the Storches. I love Ike’s hairzzz.)

I don't get how an unobtrusive donate button can be so offensive. We all have our own spending habits and budgets and can make decisions that best suit our needs. I feel similarly to many of the above commenters and am happy to donate considering I've enjoyed all of Amy's well-written stories for free. I would buy a friend a drink or appetizer, spend money on a movie ticket or lunch for myself, buy my dog a new squeaky toy, or go get my nails done, and I can trade any one of those activities to donate. While Ike's reading needs are tremendously important, self care is also important. Even the small change some of us can spare will add up (maybe like the cat grandpa story from Wisconsin).

Thank you for being you and sharing you and your family with us for all these years, and free to us to boot. Thank you for adding the button. Donation incoming!

I'm glad you put up a button. I hate that you had to get defensive and write this post. You should have a button even if you didn't need the money. You could be Scrooge McDuck rich and still deserve to be compensated for the service you provide, your art, your work. Monetize it however you can. No one tells actors that they only get paid for a movie if they didn't go on vacation that year. One tells the tech support hotline, "wait, I'm going to need to see your financial statements to determine if you really need the $150 per hour - and if you remodeled a kitchen, my call is free." Do not be ashamed to be compensated for your art that so many of us enjoy. If extra cash is an incentive for you to keep posting, all the better for us. It's not charity; it's an exchange transaction. Helping Ike is a bonus, on both sides.