Unsocial Media
In Which She Writes Promises Her Blog Can't Cash

In Which She Attempts To Revive the Dead

Hello, my dear Internet void. I am feeling a rare burst of big run-on sentence energy this week, plus I finally got around to organizing a metric fuck-ton of photos and realized I would like to force other people to look at them.

And since I've gone full Social Media Hermit and no longer use any of the FaceTokGramTubes, I might as well go full troglodyte and post them HERE, on my little prehistoric e-cave wall.

But there are a lot! Where to even begin, at this point? So I figured I would ask you, the collective you, the entire maybe half-dozen of you who remember this site exists, what you would like to see and/or read about first:

  1. Spring break photos!
  2. Pet photos!
  3. That Time We All Got COVID!
  4. Christmas photos, because DAMN, how is this even still a blog, yo?
  5. Bathroom renovation photos, plus That Time the Kids Put a $1,000 Tub Fixture Out With the Recycling!!1!

Is this perhaps just a shameless attempt to get some of those sweet, sweet serotonin hits of attention that I've been missing? Will I actually follow through on something I promise here, for once in my goddamned life? WHO KNOWS. TAKE A CHANCE. LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE AND SHIT.

Please list your topic preferences in order, in the comments. And thank you for this important contribution to the national discourse.



I want any and all content. Miss hearing about the kids and everything!!


I'd take all of the above in whatever order floats your boat. I so miss your sense of humor! C'mon - brighten my days!!!!


+1 for all content and thank you!


pretty much all of it but if i were to narrow it down:
the time you all got covid
the time the bathroom fixture went with the recycling
I'm all about the dramzzz


1) Bathroom Reno
2) Spring Break
3) Pets
4) Xmas
5) Covid

Rule follower over here, y'all.



You actually popped into my mind last week and I went digging to make sure I hadn't missed something on the FaceTokGramTubes. I'm so happy to see this tiny tidbit of a post from you. Yes to all of it, but if you make me choose, here's my order of preference: 5, 3, 1, 2, 4.


Too tired to prioritize and have to pee, so with the obligatory +1 to anything and every is a-ok encouragement I will attempt to woefully deliver on the assignment and gonna say how about that bathroom reno? I might be influenced by my own completely unplanned bathroom reno and bonus replace-chimney-🤑-before-it-runs-away-from-home vantage point. Reading about other folks unplanned or planned house spending will make me feel less alone 😬


POST. IT. ALL! Have missed your writing and your humor! :)


All the things!


“Woefully” was supposed to be “wordily” damnit


Post all of it. We miss you.

Suzy Q

1, 2, 3, 5

Oh, just post ALL OF IT 😁


Hi! YES to all the photos in any order, I'm curious if I'll even recognise the boys! I'm happy you got this urge, I'm not that present on the different platforms.


If I have to choose, COVID first, please. But whatever feels right to you.


All the above, in chronological order.


I'm just a girl, typing here, wondering what the deodorants have been up to...also, all of the things you listed. Bring it.


All of it! All the time!

But if I have to choose an order (and with the fear that it won't all get posted before you go dark):
2) Pets
3) bathroom
4) spring break
5) Christmas


All of them! But bathroom reno first haha. I’ve missed your posts.


As someone currently living through a complete kitchen renovation, please regale me with how your kids almost tossed a $1000 bathroom fixture.

Then just tell me whatever you want!


we’ll take it all!


I dunno... no tirewatch?


Renovation pics, because I've been stuck in a kitchen remodeling time loop since the first shutdown and misery loves company.

Pets, because of course.

And then any and every thing you choose to post. I've missed you!


We need it all. ALL OF IT!


All of it, but I'm dying for the covid story, since we just had to cut our 3 week road trip short due to that nasty bug. (Yes, we're fully vaxxed.) Sending love your way!


Anything! In any order! I have missed you and all your men. And the pets. And the deodorants. And the ALLCAPS. ESPECIALLY THOSE :-)

Heather Clarke

Anything. Everything. We miss you!


Any and or all! Welcome home!


All of the above! Missed your voice and would love to hear from you.


As you can see, we’ve missed you. I’ll read it all. Been following since the yesteryears.


We need photos! Especially the HAIRZ on your offspring. And measurement of the tall, gangly teenagers.


3, 2, 1, 4, 5. So, all of them. Haha.

Sindi Sheers

2, 1, 3 or whatever you want.

Jennifer Fox

Everything!! But definitely that $1000 bathroom fixture 😳😳😳😳 Have missed your voice. Would love to read anything you care to write. ❤️


The recycling story, for sure.


1, 3, 4, 2, 5. But I'll take whatever I can get! I miss your updates!


Deodorant Wars!
And the rest... :)


Spring break photos!
Pet photos!
That Time We All Got COVID!
Christmas photos, because DAMN, how is this even still a blog, yo?
Bathroom renovation photos, plus That Time the Kids Put a $1,000 Tub Fixture Out With the Recycling!!1!


This is so exciting!! I started reading you as a young clueless 22 year old Scot in first job out of university, living in London. (Target audience?!) Now a 39 year old mum of two back in Scotland and still desperate to hear your news!! So anything and everything please - I will read it ALL!!


Yes to all!

I am in revive the blog mode, because I need to do ALL the WRITING THINGS, but it's going to be more academic and professional pursuits, so it'll probably be a completely different URL...

Jennifer Crawford

I will take any kind of update you can give us! I miss you you so much (you know, because in my head we're totally friends and need to catch up soon).


I’m here for all of it. Give me that hit of mid-2000s blog stream/of-consciousness. The good stuff. 😜

Susannah Hall Perry

OMG hi! I just finished reading this long ass article about how downhill all the FaceTokGramTubes have gone and how they are ruining everything and everyone and then up pops this little piece of happy as a reminder of the very best parts of the internet. So if I MUST choose...
5, 3, 1, 2, 4
Glad to see your voice!


Oh definitely that recycled fixture first!

I'm an awful (inconsistently checking in) follower so I'm glad I caught this post.


omg why did I type my whole ass name like I was signing an email... stupid grown person accidental habits.


Bathroom renovation photos, plus That Time the Kids Put a $1,000 Tub Fixture Out With the Recycling!!
Christmas photos, because DAMN, how is this even still a blog, yo?
Pet photos!
Spring Break Photos!
That time we all got COVID!
I've missed the run on sentences, I'm so excited!!!!

Hope Rutten

All of the topics please!


Bathroom Renovation + recycling drama
Spring Break! (how big are all your boys now?)
That time we all got COVID (we did too, except my f-ing bionic husband that didn't)
Hope you all are well and excited to see you back on the internetz!


Yes to any and all of it!


Always love bathroom renovation photos, but yup, thumbs up to all of them!


I have no preference for the order of these but I do request separate posts for EACH OF THEM please!!! I so miss reading the personal blogs of all you guys who I followed FOREVER but who have now all drifted away:(. Five new Amalah posts would make me so happy!


Welcome back!

Spring break, COVID, bathroom, Christmas, pets


Post it all please. I've missed your voice and I've missed your voice in ALL CAPS.


I had decided you'd quit this entirely and hadnt checked in quite awhile. Something told me to peek in today and YAY here you are. I pick the bathroom reno for topic #1 then the COVID story. Glad to see you back! :)


I'm firmly in "start with the bathroom reno story, but I want all the stories and photos!" Camp


Alllll the things pleeze!

Patrick Preblick

Can’t wait to hear whatever you’re willing to share. Always rooting for the Storches!


Bath renovations for my #1 draft pick


Oldest to newest! I am a suckered for chronological order. Would love to hear it all.


5, 3, 1, 4, 2
Happy you’re back ❤️

ccr in MA

Anything! Any and all of these but also anything else you decide to write about first is fine with me.

So happy for Feedly on days like this, when a blog rises again!


Everything! So happy to see your posts come across my feedly.


Well HELLLOOOO there, long time no see!!! So happy to see you back!!! Post anything pls, we have missed everything!


all please. forced prioritization (under protest)

2. Pets
3. Bathroom
4. spring break
5. xmas


You have been missed



HOORAY! If you're truly ambivalent, *how* did the kids put a $1000 bathroom fixture out with the recycling, because that takes talent and we knew your kids were talented but I didn't think they had *that* talent... Otherwise, please just write whatever you want to write and we'll enjoy it.


All, please! But if you really did want an order then .. 2, 5, 3, 1, 4?


So excited for all of the content! I was just missing your posts.
Bathroom fixtures


As much as you feel like sharing (yeah, hoping for all of it).

p.s. So sorry to hear you all go the dreaded gunk. Ugh. Hope you're all recovered well.


All, please. If I have to pick one, I'm in for the recycling of bathroom fixtures.


1, 2, 3, 4, 5, please, thank you. I'm sure I'm not the only one who's missed you a lot.

Rebecca M

Your "posting for attention-fueled serotonin" need nicely matches my "procrastinating by reading random things on the internet" habit, so I think we can mutually enable one another.



Omg I’ve missed you!!!!
I’ll take 1,5 and 4!


Any and all. I’ve missed your writing.


3 and 5 so glad you're alive!


Here for any and all of it!

Lisa K

All of it, but will take any of it that you get to.


So happy you posted! Everything please!


I am here for whatever whenever you would like to post. So glad you are still alive and in the world, though. :) If I have to pick? Bathroom reno! :)


Oh YAY I’m so glad to see you. Yet another vote for ALL OF IT but here is my votes for the order:
Spring break


Christmas, Spring Break, Bathroom

But really, anything!


Any and all is welcome! Missed your posts!


Anything, but per request:
1. That Time We All Got COVID!
2. Bathroom renovation photos, plus That Time the Kids Put a $1,000 Tub Fixture Out With the Recycling!!1!
3. Spring break photos!
4. Pet photos!
5. Christmas photos, because DAMN, how is this even still a blog, yo?

Pat Birnie

You obviously still have a lot of fans. I think Noah was a wee baby when I first found your blog. Glad to see you pop up again! Any order but want to hear about the bathroom reno first! I hope you saved that $1000 fixture!!

Judy P.

1. Bathroom renovation
2. Pet photos
3. COVID! (my boyfriend gave it to me for Valentine's Day!)
4. Christmas photos
5. Spring break photos (only because kids need to grow in order, and if you do Spring Break before Christmas then the kids will shrink and my head might explode even more with how HUGE they all got!)


All of the above, please! So thrilled to see you pop up again!


So glad to see you again! Pets plz


All of it (and I tried to subscribe, but the link at the top of your page just takes me to a page full of code.)


What they all said, please!

Jessica Karlinski

Anything and everything. I miss your stories!

Robyn Morris

No particular order, but you're telling me there's no Tire Watch 2022? $1000 bathtub fixture in the recycling is very tantalizing...


Hi! Yay! Please don't leave again, all is forgiven!!!

Bathroom renovation photos, plus That Time the Kids Put a $1,000 Tub Fixture Out With the Recycling!!1!
That Time We All Got COVID!
Christmas photos
Spring break photos!
Pet photos!

Lisa R.

All, but especially 2 and 5.


All the above, pretty please! ❤️


Any and all updates on your fam. The more drama, the better. Missed you and yours.


YAY! So glad you're ok. Whatever and any content you'd like to share I'm here for.


So happy you are back!! Overpunctuating happy!!!

I will take any and all of it - even #3!


I demand a full reintroduction to the family, as though none of us has seen you in like two years. (Cough)


First comment here in neigh on a DECADE and it's to say I NEED the bathroom fixture story PLEASE. Also hey, glad you and the family are well!


Have we scared you (inadvertently) with our enthusiasm?
Anything your heart desires please and thank you.


I've missed you all and your sense of humor! Come back❤ I miss old school blogs.....

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