In honor of Cyber Monday, it's better mental health through consumerism, betches. In no particular order, other than in the order I remember them as I wander around my house: Brain-Saving Plan to-do list/mental health planner & Punch Today In the Face motivational coaster (KatieAbeyDesign, Etsy) The part of my brain that took the longest to heal (post-apocalyptic ZZZZZPPPTTTZZZZ-style short-out) was/is, unfortunately, the part that allows me to simply sit the fuck down and get shit the fuck done. Oh, I'm plenty good at making long, elaborate to-do lists around 3 a.m., along with the many terrible consequences that will surely rain down after my subsequent failure to complete said to-do list. But by 9 a.m., I've lost all sense of urgency and/or curled into a paralyzed ball of panic and procrastination. There are a LOT of mental health planners and motivational office supplies aimed at correcting this pattern, but I found most of them either too shmaltzy and motivational-quote heavy, or entirely too detailed and similar to my 3 a.m. version. (DRINK EIGHT GLASSES OF WATER OR FAIL AT TUESDAY!) This one from KatieAbeyDesign on Etsy is way, way more my speed. Keep Fucking Going bracelet (Amazon) Simple, to... Read more →

This post is sponsored by thredUP. photobombin ur sponsorships again yay You might think that, with three boy babies, the hand-me-down game would be pretty straightforward. And for awhile, it was! I shuffled onesies and footie jammies from child to child, removing anything too worn out, replacing the modest wardrobe gaps only as needed. As they grew, the hand-me-down bins got a little bigger and keeping them organized got a little more challenging (still never found that missing bin of size 3T shorts, btw!!), but overall, our annual back-to-school closet lift-and-shift system worked. And then the babies grew into people. People with opinions. Noah and Ike prefer to live in the standard-issue boy-uniform of Under Armour shorts, Old Navy jeans, and a variety of graphic tees. (Though by the time Noah's clothes shuffle on down the chain, Ike's been ending up with fewer and fewer wearable options.) They're doubly easy because they both like anything that's blue or orange. Any old video-game character will do. They each pick out one pair of (blue) sneakers and wear them until they fall apart, and will happily walk out the door in clothing that's visibly ripped or stained or inside-out if I'm not... Read more →

This post is sponsored by thredUP. Get an extra 30% off your first order at thredUP with my promo code: AMALAH30 It's springtime! Who's ready to do some shopping? /collective grooooooansssss Ah, the changing of the seasons, when those of us who live where we get the absolute worst of all four of them (my year is basically two long allergy seasons sandwiched between either unbearable humidity or blizzards) get to inventory our wardrobes to determine what: 1) still fits, 2) still bears some semblance of current fashion, and 3) didn't get eaten by moths or peed on by cats during its time in storage. Some years are better than others. This year was...not great, especially on criteria #1. Thankfully, once again, it's thredUP to the rescue! Where I can get new spring/summer clothing that: 1) still fits, and 2) is actually something I want to wear in the year of our lord 2019, and 3) doesn't cost a small fortune because the only things you can buy on sale right now are like, parkas and turtlenecks. But hurry! Because you have about 10 (literally) hot minutes to buy stuff for summer because the stores around here start trying to... Read more →

This post is sponsored by RetailMeNot. So this is happening. Starting next week, the carpet is getting ripped up and hardwoods are going down, and all our furniture is going...I don't even know where yet. Crammed into the garage and a hallway. Maybe the bathtubs. We'll be living in the basement with a lot of boxes and some very confused dogs. While it will be SO NICE to have the project done in time for the holidays, it's...um, not exactly convenient timing in the meantime. There will be no Christmas tree until the floors are done, and our holiday shopping budget is wafer thin. The kids aren't really asking for much, thank goodness, and as long as I agreed that the Charlie Brown Christmas tree and a few other decorations could come out of storage, they seem satisfied. (I set up a holiday-themed reading nook in place of the real tree, which has gone over really well. Ike has of course been wearing Christmas jammies since June.) (Stockings for Hobbes the Tiger and Tahu the Bioncle, naturally.) (Oh yay this guy again. I can't wait to forget to move him and bolt awake every night at 2 a.m., cursing the... Read more →

In exactly one month from today, I will be turning 40 years old. I suppose I should Feel Something About That, but...not really? I'm more stunned by the realization that I'm only 10 years away from being 50 years old, at which point I can FINALLY fulfill my life-long dream of living full-time as Molly Shannon's SNL character. Better get working on those high kicks! (Although I have no intention of shying away from my age, I do admit I am intrigued by a fellow-39-going-on-40 friend's plan to say he's "39 Part II" and then "39 Part III," then end the trilogy by turning 42, at which point he can literally be the answer to Life, the Universe and Everything. That's a solid plan and I applaud it.) I really enjoyed my 30s though, and all the growing/evolving as a person mixed with a solid appreciation for no longer giving a fuck. I'm hoping that trend continues and I can put off being too Set In My Ways for awhile longer. (Unless, of course, My Ways involve lots of insane hats, occasional day drinking. fighting the patriarchy from a tricked-out motorized scooter, and always tipping the waitstaff well.) THAT SAID,... Read more →

We're coming up on the year anniversary of The Worst Week Ever, when we lost both Ceiba and Max in hideous, rapid-fire succession. So it's been interesting that over the past couple weeks I've fielded an unusually high number of emails with questions about the new pets. Specifically, how/when/why-type questions about our decision(s) to adopt them, from readers who are either dealing with a recent loss (or double whammy like ours, I'm so sorry Jen, 21017 can suck it), or are considering adopting themselves and want some honest real-talk about the process. And while answering these emails, I've probably written like, enough words to fill four blog posts about it. So...let's re-purpose some shit! FAPQ #1: How did you know you were ready to adopt a new dog? I dunno. I kind of didn't? The boys brought up the possibility of a new dog almost immediately after we broke the news about Ceiba's cancer to them. Jason was like, "That's a good idea." I was like, "Slow your damn rolls, you monsters, she's not even dead yet." And then I spent the next few days mourning deeply for that dog, the one that wasn't even dead yet. The appointment to... Read more →

This post is sponsored by thredUP. I was folding Ike's laundry recently and came across some clothing that had...seen better days, to put it nicely. Shirts and pants with permanent stains, worn-out seams, holes started to emerge at the knees and elbows. All clothing that had been passed down to him; most of it previously worn by both of his older brothers. Hand-me-downs are a wonderful thing, but we're definitely stretching the limits of them at this point. Ike so rarely gets new clothing that's just for HIM, he gets irrationally excited over new pajamas or a cheap souvenir t-shirt. One morning he came bursting into my room to thank me for the new bag of socks I'd emptied into his drawer. Socks! New ones! Look Ma, no holes! Poor third child. Enter thredUP. I shopped at thredUP a lot back in the day when it was a parent-to-parent kids' clothing swap service. It's since evolved to a really amazing online consignment store, packed with both kids' and women's clothing -- along with a pretty big selection of high-end and designer brands. (Which always makes my clicking finger start to itch.) The kids’ section is GREAT because I can buy... Read more →

Hello! How was everybody's Thanksgiving? Did y'all trample anybody over an Xbox? (Are Xboxes still a thing? I don't know what the thing is this year. Because all my children are getting is the Xbox we already own, that Ezra broke as a toddler by feeding it Legos. Jason figured out how to fix it, so TA DA! Here's your Christmas miracle, kids.) (The boys all really, really want an Xbox, but I keep saying NO XBOX because I'm a mom who hates fun and plus you guys broke the last one. I am still saying NO XBOX even now, to their great collective distress because it's ALL THEY WANT FROM SANTA, because I'm ALSO a mom with a video camera who wants an epic reaction on Christmas morning, mwa ha ha.) (I am also a mom with an upper respiratory infection and goddamn bonus pinkeye right now. This has nothing to do with anything else in this post, but it feels wrong not to mention in because I'm whiny and sad and leaking out of way too many parts of my face right now.) In honor of Cyber Monday and literally everybody on the planet telling you where to... Read more →

POWER RANKED IN ORDER OF WHICH BOOKS HAVE BEEN LITERALLY LOVED TO PIECES AND/OR EATEN (BECAUSE LOVE) (ALSO TEETHING) We have QUITE the library of children's books in our house. I'd call them children's literature but...I dunno. Some of our books are really dumb and make me kind of stabby. (Has anyone read The Little Engine That Could lately? Do you remember it being so long? Because it's soooo looooonnng. It's like 20 solid minutes of crying toys, mean trains, laments about the good little girls and boys in the valley not having any milk or fruit or toys [which are STILL CRYING], heavy-handed symbolism for Get The Fuck Over Yourself And Help The Goddamn Train Already, with a bonus clown who kind of looks like the great-grand-uncle of Pennywise.) (Our copy got mysteriously lost during the great move-that-didn't-happen house purge. AND I'M NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT SORRY.) The above photo is but a small representative sample of our book collection, but I believe runs an acceptable gamut of board books that your baby/toddler will love, to those he/she will tolerate, to those that no baby or toddler ever gave two shits about but no matter, you will somehow... Read more →

This post is sponsored by the Honest Company. Have we talked about Noah's weird skin? I feel like we haven't talked about Noah's weird skin. Okay, "weird" probably isn't the right or nicest word — the cosmetics industry would probably just prefer I label it as "sensitive" but I think that undersells the full scope of crazy-making issues we've faced with Noah's skin. Up until he started preschool, he'd regularly get eczema every winter. But it didn't bother him at all. I never once saw that child scratch or rub at the CLEARLY horribly dry, angry raised patches that would appear and scatter all over his arms and legs. I've always guessed that his SPD had something to do with it — he was really underresponsive to temperature, so many he just didn't feel...itchy sensations, either? I don't know. I do know that at some point, his body suddenly switched on and decided to START PAYING ATTENTION TO THINGS. TO ALL OF THE THINGS. And while it's really nice to have a child who can tell you that you've accidentally turned his bath to boiling and who no longer steps off the bus wearing his winter coat even though the... Read more →